Ramblings from a "that guy"

A day late, but a dollar extra!

ajhatch — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 04:47:14 +0000

Anyone reading this who has done themselves the disservice of reading my previous post knows that this is a day late. Well, I have bad news, and I gave good news. The bad news is that you’re reading this blog. The good news is that I have an actual topic to ramble about. After all, it’s the end of the year, and so comes everybody’s favorite part of the new year: recaps on every major news station! What’s more, it’s the end of a decade, so we get TEN years’ worth of recaps! After viewing about 20 minutes of old news this evening, I determined that the world must grind to a halt at the end of every year. After all, there can’t be any REAL news happening, its RECAP TIME! Well, at least NBC said that Michael Jackson’s death was “unforgettable.” That must mean we won’t have to hear about it again.

Happy Festivus Eve!

ajhatch — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 02:13:45 +0000

Tommorrow, as you know, is the most important holiday of the year: Festivus, the holiday for the rest of us! Put out the metal pole and prepare your grievances-its the best holiday of the year. I will be taking a short break from blogging for this all-important holiday. See ya’ll on the 27th.

I am frightened beyond belief.

ajhatch — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 04:50:34 +0000

“In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google’s cache, even after you die, in a sort of “Google Afterlife”.”

Find that quote, win a cookie. Anyway, I just realized that that is entirely true. However, it is not what frightens me. What frightens me is that…I can’t remember the movie it makes me think of!

Don’t you “happy holidays” me!

ajhatch — Sat, 19 Dec 2009 23:45:04 +0000

(Portions in brackets sponsored by fox news) [Today, I went holiday christmas shopping. I wished the clerk happy holidays merry christmas, and went into the parking lot. After passing a car with a democrat communist bumper sticker, I finally got home to write this post.] Yes. I absolutely hate the controversy over happy-holidays vs merry christmas. Like, honestly, who CARES? Places like fox news act like its the biggest problem on the planet, but, they’re GROWN MEN! Why does this matter? Anyway, I look forward to seeing Avatar in imax3d this week. I hope its good, the reviews are treating it pretty well. Anybody else see it? I was bummed that the game didn’t do well, I was hoping we’d have a repeat of Wolverine: Origins’ game. Anyway, happy holidays, Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, solstice, etc. See ya later.

My, that was a fast 3 days

ajhatch — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 03:42:46 +0000

Sorry, my infinitely small readerbase, I seem to have vanished for three days. I was very ill and was unable to post. It occurred to me, that, given the fickleness of the blogsphere, my entire presence on the web may have just vanished into a puff of memes. Anyway, I have a letter to actionscript 3.0

Dear Actionscript 3.0,

I hate you. It’s not me, it’s you. Die. Thank you.

Anyway, I’ve obviously been having trouble with that new coding overhaul, but that’s a personal problem. In other news, the other day I became perfect ammo for people of walmart. I was standing in the store picking up something or other when I looked down and realized I was wearing my slippers.

The monty python ones. With the rabbit, and the fangs.

I wanted to die. Then I woke up nearly screamed at the top of my lungs and fled the store. I am never, ever going back. Especially not to that checkout line. For all I care, my bag can stay there forever.

Internation Sock Day

ajhatch — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 20:12:40 +0000

I have an idea for a new holiday. Now, don’t go wandering away at the thought-plenty of holidays are just made up (you thought that would be something offensive to the Religous, didn’t you? For shame, reader, for shame.) Here is my idea: imagine if we replaced, for one day, all uses of profanity with the word “sock.” This isn’t some sort of anti-profanity thing, its a real idea. Think of it. “Oh honey, SOCK me!” “Ow, what the sock?” “Get out of my way, you sock-hole!” I’m sure you’re thinking of the possibilities yourself. On another note, to everyone on the internet WhO tYpEs LiKe ThIs, that doesn’t really impress anyone. In fact, its just a corruption of “1337speak” or leetspeak, the nerd-hacker language/code of olden days. This is why I also encourage everyone to respond to youtube comments in ThIs StYlE in such a fashion that it scares the bejeebus out of any young troll-1|\| |>, |_||\||23|3|\|+1|\|9 1337.

Wasn’t that frightening?

I hate sundays

ajhatch — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 03:34:23 +0000

Sure, Sunday-a day off, you’re not at work (or school, if that’s the case), but-how many of you spend Sunday not dreading the fact that monday is tommorrow. Then again, in a mere 2 days, monday will be yesterday and wednesday will be tommorrow. In which case, sunday would be 2 days ago, and…I need to get a calculator.

“Very Web 2.0″

ajhatch — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 05:16:42 +0000

The description “very web 2.0″ seems to be all over the trendy internet news outlets. After seeing the phrase about a million times, and being a part time web designer myself, I decided to read an article on it. Alright, I understand that web 2.0 merely refers to the internet that is not a bajillion “WELCOME TO THE PERSONAL SITE OF REAH ANDREWS I LOVE PUPPIES” geocities personals, but is it actually justified to be used as a sweeping term to describe something? It’s as if someone used the phrase “that’s so 2009,” or “that’s not very 2009.” Wait.

My belts are alive.

ajhatch — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 05:02:23 +0000

So, the other day, I was getting dressed when I realized that I needed to put on a belt. I didn’t “need” to put one on, I just wanted to make that sort of “I’m wearing a belt so I just THAT much cooler than you” kind of statement. I glanced around in the living room, where I was positive I had left it the day before. When I found it in my bedroom, I came to the obvious conclusion: my belt is alive. It made made the journey from the living room to my bedroom during the night. I wonder if it is breeding with my other belts. Maybe I should donate some to charity to prevent overpopulation. Most likely, I should just stop eating ice cream and pizza for breakfast.